Do You Know that the Bible Tells You How to Love Your Wife?

10 tips for marital happiness.

Maybe the inspired Biblical writers saw the truth in the old adage: Happy wife, happy life. A wife who feels cherished is likely to cherish her husband, too. But if you don’t feel appreciative at the moment, perhaps you could start by thinking how lonely you’d be without her. When Adam was by himself, God saw it wasn’t good for him to be alone and so decided to “make a helper suited to him” (Genesis 2:18). You have a life-long companion—what a blessing! Thank God for her and pray for her every day.

Husbands have a duty to love and honor their wives. Would you like to be the kind of husband whose wife thinks he’s the greatest guy in the world? Then follow this advice:
 
1. “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her”  (Ephesians 5:25).

Christ’s love for the Church is unlimited and unstoppable; he gave his life for the Church. By God’s command, love your wife as if you were giving your life to God. 

2. “Husbands should love their wives as [they do] their own bodies” (Ephesians 5:28).

Take care of your wife’s needs and well-being. Share in her pain and sickness, and rejoice in her health as if it were your own. You should strive with all your strength to fulfill her spiritual, physical, emotional and economic needs. Only this way can you love her and provide for her, just as you do for yourself. 

3.  “husbands should live with your wives in understanding, showing honor to [them], since we are joint heirs of the gift of life …” (1 Peter 3:7a).

To understand her needs and honor them, you have to renounce yourself. When she needs to lift heavy things, do it for her! If she needs time, give it to her! Help your wife with all of your energy, and show her your love with all of your attention. Ask God for the grace of seeing in what situations you are inconsiderate, and correct your behavior.

4. “Husbands, love your wives, and avoid any bitterness toward them” (Colossians 3:19).

If your wife is sensitive, then harsh answers, anger, an irritated tone of voice and impatience will affect her deeply. Always act towards her and speak to her lovingly and respectfully. Remember that your wife is a precious gift from God.

5. “Let marriage be honored among all and the marriage bed be kept undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4).
Jesus says, “everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). Keep your marriage pure by training your heart and eyes to be faithful to your wife. Your marriage will reap great benefits if you do! Thank the Lord for beauty and appreciate it, but keep your eyes, happiness, mind and heart focused on your wife.

6. “Why then, my son, should you be intoxicated with a stranger, and embrace another woman?” (Proverbs 5:20)

Being attracted to other women and looking at them with lust will diminish the image you have of your wife. You will be less satisfied with her, and she will feel less special to you. No man can form the habit of looking at other women without his wife noticing it. When you ask God for the grace of only being attracted to your wife, she will notice that too, and she will feel like the queen of the world, and you will fall more deeply in love with her.

7. “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband, too, praises her” (Proverbs 31:28).

Tell her that she is special and that she is better than any other woman on earth. Don’t only talk about her physical beauty, but also about how much you value her as a person. See how happy it makes her when you fill her ears with praise. She longs for those words and wants to hear them from you!

8. “To find a wife is to find happiness, a favor granted by the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22).

Think how lonely you would be without her. You have a life-long companion – what a blessing! Thank God for her and pray for her every day. 

9. “‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’” (Matthew 19:5).

Enjoy your life with her. Get home to be with her as fast as you can when you get out of work. Think about her during the day; call her every day. Learn to come to agreements as a couple. Invest time in conversation with her and in sharing the events of the day. Show genuine interest, listening attentively, giving her your complete attention and looking each other in the eye. Be as if you were one. 

10. Honor your wives since they “are joint heirs of the gift of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Peter 3, 7b).

In the Sacrament of Matrimony, you and your wife received the same grace. Cultivate it: pray with her, go to Mass together and together visit the Blessed Sacrament and pray the Rosary. Build your marriage founded on Jesus, holding Mary’s hand.

This article originally appeared on the website of the Archdiocese of Mexico and is used with permission. All rights reserved.